What if babies could sing opera?

I’m talking like a 1 or 2 year old infant. See it in your mind’s eye. Would it be beautiful? Would it be terrifying? Could we do a baby version of La Boheme? Did I just come up with an amazing idea for a “look who’s talking now” style opera cross over movie? Yes, to all of it.

I spend a lot of my time thinking about babies singing opera. Mainly because they phonate without a concept of language or vowel sounds, which allows them to make REALLY loud sounds. Our attachment to language and speech often inhibits us from finding a full spectrum of vocal colors. Have you ever noticed that when we hurt ourselves we always say “OW!” A diphthong vowel sound. Whenever we’re excited we have to yell WOOOOO! Why can I not just yell complete utter nonsense at a football game? If I scream “YEAAAAAH” as loud as I can, it’s socially acceptable but as soon as I yell “ WWUUUUUUUHHGGGAAAHHH” I’m a fucking maniac? Society should keep it’s vowel privilege to itself and let me use whatever sounds I want when I’m bangin’ my toe, yelling at Joe, or humpin’ my bro.

Jared IceComment